Reckless

So I've had a lot of time to process what went down on the retreat I just got back from, and the fact that I'm completely caffeinated right now, so I'm going to write something.

Kind of spring boarding off of my last post, I'm pretty sure that I'm scared of something. I think God's revealed this to me and it's this:

I'm afraid of the way my present affects my future. That's why I have such a hard time living in it.

My past isn't really the problem. I mean, yeah, I think about mistakes I've made a lot, everyone does, but I don't think that my past is what dictates what my decisions are.

Part of the problem with being a visionary, which people constantly tell me I am, is that I have no voice of reason in my head. I have no voice that says, that's absurd, or that's probably not a good choice for you right now. So I appreciate all of the people around me that keep me real. But here's the thing.

I can't keep sitting around worrying about my future. I need to be more recklessly abandoned. With God. With relationships. With the times that life sucks. I just need to lose my mind a bit.

So help me with this. Give me a little peer pressure (in a good way).

This is it.